Posts in Wellness
How making dietary changes with kids can be easy (and fun!)
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Hey, hey, Mae: I struggle with getting my kids to even try new foods, so they’re stuck on their favorites and those contain loads of what we may need to try an elimination for.
How can I make this work for our family?

For the most part we’ve all had to do it.  The baby is gassy so Mom cuts dairy for a season.  A friend is stopping by who can’t have peanuts, so we switch up our lunch menu.  Or maybe Dad received a diabetes diagnosis, so sugary foods are removed from our cabinets and the family must go on.  Implementing food changes can be easy...until our feelings and our kids’ opinions get involved, right?

Our family’s shift into going gluten and dairy-free came on pretty quickly.  My sickness hit quickly and progressed rapidly into multiple autoimmune diseases alongside a hefty bout with mono.  I had simultaneously just realized the connection to gluten and dairy as triggers for other health issues within the family, so we made those cuts house-wide.  I spent the next 18 months eating the autoimmune paleo diet to heal and eventually reverse some of my autoimmune disease. It was a worthy endeavor, but it was tricky on my heart and on the day-to-day meal prep as a sick body with two preschool sons.  I had to figure out how to skip eggs, gluten, dairy, nuts, seeds, nightshades, sugar and a couple other intolerances for myself while still feeding our family. And fortunately it was used for good as /I kept introducing my meals to the boys alongside theirs and slowly got to meld the two as the boys became more accustomed to variety.

For us, I was steering the food boat and the boys were tiny and riding it.  I also had a lot on the line as I was significantly held back by my sicknesses and needed to get better for the sake of my tiny sons.  Food changes aren’t always this pressing and can often be pretty tricky. In that season I learned lots about switching up foods, family-wide - to either widen our palates or meet our changing dietary needs.  Here are some tips on making food changes, whether you make many at once or simply do a family-wide or individual food elimination for a few weeks.

Swap for a substitution

Basics first.  Going to be eliminating dairy?  Choose a replacement for as many places that you’d traditionally use dairy.  Get wise about the available alternatives! There are many nut cheeses that you can grab to take for the girls’ night charcuterie spread.  If you tolerate goat or sheep’s milk, perhaps you get familiar with local farmers who sell their cheese. Grab an almond, macadamia and coconut milk next time you’re at the grocery so you’ve got multiple alternatives for replacing your toddler’s nightcap.  Whatever you do, don’t start you elimination until you have some substitutes for favorites.

Plan for those food celebrations

Our food gets us in our feelings a LOT so we want to be sure you’ve got options. Birthday party coming up?  Grab a can of dairy-free icing at the grocery before hand or pop over to my pinterest boards to find a suitable birthday cake substitution.  You can even search out local establishments that take the prep work out of “___-free” foods - a local allergen free bakery or even your local whole foods will have some easy options.  

Approach food holidays and traditions with a plan.  My boys and I do hot chocolate and whipped cream on Christmas Eve as a fun little nightcap.  Weeks before, I spent a little pinterest time perusing through ideas for Christmas cookie substitutes and also made a plan to grab chocolate almond milk to easily heat and tossed a can of coconut cream in the fridge so I could scoop some “whip” into their cups.  We didn’t miss out on the tradition and it was stress-free for me because I planned ahead.  No one was sad and frankly - no one thought anything of the melty coconut cream because we were doing our thing.  

Many items in small quantities

When working in new foods, present newbies alongside old favorites and cut down on the quantities you serve.  When we’re adding a new item the boys haven’t had, I will make their plates with 3 pieces of each food available that night.  They generally get to the end of their plate, are still starving and will often ask for more of everything without a second guess.

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Prepare a food many ways

When adding in a new food, I often try to present a raw piece alongside a cooked piece.  Tonight we had roasted broccoli, so I tossed a small frozen piece next to the roasted one and an additional raw piece.  One boy ate all three, the other ate all but the frozen and just before bed they both asked to have a frozen piece to knaw on.  Now. I can’t say that I would have ever thought of frozen broccoli as great, but the boys like it at the moment and I like that they’re chowing down on veggies before bed.  I apply this rule to eggs a LOT. I’ll cook one egg scrambled, fry one next to it and slice a hard boiled egg in half. I’ll serve all three in a line and often they all get eaten and the boys have good questions about how they’re prepared, why they look that way, etc.  Sometimes it earns me conversation at breakfast!

Present fun food right next to veggie

Shake it up a bit.  Be wise about how you present the foods to your kiddos.  I like to put sweet and boring foods right next to one another.  I keep everything tidy and not touching because heaven forbid a child’s food touch!  I make sure to make not make a scene about which foods are yummier than others or reserve foods for the end of the meal.  If the boys want to eat all their fruit first - cool. They can eat all of their chicken last. It doesn’t matter to me the order, nor do I spotlight foods in lesser categories (veggies, eh) or “oooo!” categories (strawberries).  

Institute extras

With kiddos, sometimes play is key.  Both of my boys around 2-years-old were fascinated by dips and sauces.  With every meal they got a dip or two and meal time collided with playtime.  Dips can be anything from a protein yogurt to applesauce to pesto. The sky’s the limit when it comes to dips - remember that you set their food “norms.”  Pesto is just as much a dip for chicken as ketchup is if you make it so.  

My boys love it when I pair foods for them on the plate.  If I think they’d enjoy their noodles with a dollop of goat cheese, I plate them next to one another.  Since I know they love a dip for strawberries, I’ll put a dollop of coconut cream next to the berries and toss in a new piece of fruit they they may enjoy dipped.  Shapes and skewers count as extras, too. Roll that pickle inside of a piece of salami and stick a toothpick in it? I guarantee you your son will try it.  Call a skewere a fruit sword? Again….boys will down it all.  My last trick to keep some small cookie cutters handy.  I’ll press their watermelon out in fun shapes and eat the scraps myself.  Adding a little fun in for busy bodies almost always helps.

Community Plates

This is a great option for when you’re eliminating a food group.  Eliminating gluten family wide? Have a new-gluten night. Prepare a platter with several gluten free crackers, several vegetables slices in chip shapes and a few gluten free toast points.  Serve the plate alongside a favorite dip or few and use this happy introduction as a simple way to show your family the alternatives available. Make food changes normal and brave by talking about them and letting the family experience the options.  

Community plates can be great for kids to explore new foods, too.  Weekly, we’ll do a platter lunch. I place 6 or so pieces of a bunch of different foods on a plate and we 3 will share the platter together.  The boys get to watch me try the foods first and a younger brother will often mimic the older brother by trying something he otherwise wouldn’t.  And bonus? Just one dish to clean up! It also makes for sweet conversation! Another variation of this is to put various foods in each well of a muffin tin.  For some reason, digging in to grab their food is such a fun challenge and experiment.

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Locally and seasonally

Take your family for a stroll through the farmer’s market.  Give each child a bit of money to purchase what they like. Challenge the older kids to find a replacement food for the food they can’t have.  Maybe you can add in a trip to the blueberry patch or strawberry field. When we’re involved in our food choices, we’re more likely to eat them.  And bonus to eating seasonally and locally, these foods are usually a bit less money and better quality. Seek out local foods and bring the kids along - you’ll be surprised what you find in your own community!

Whatever you do, play it cool

When I present a new food or drop a less-loved food onto their plates, I typically deliver the plate and resume what I was doing in the kitchen.  Or I’ll set their plates down with mine and move right into prayer and eating. I don’t watch their plates. I don’t comment on the new or missing food.  I don’t ask their opinion, I get right to eating mine - usually leading with the least loved food that I fed.

Water cures all

My final tip is one your Mom told me to add.  Water covers a multitude of sins. It’s a rule in our house - if you’re struggling, have an attitude, were rude, seem weary, have a headache, don’t want to get moving, your belly hurts...pretty much anything - you can down a glass of water.  There are miles of reasons for why hydration is so effective, but the biggest shift I see when I ask my littles to drink a glass is their disposition. We start every meal with a juice glass full of water and they are expected to complete the glass before their next meal.  It’s easy, but it keeps everything and everyone moving as it should. It also keeps everyone a little more willing to try new things!

What I learned about going dairy-free with children!
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Hey, hey, Mae: I heard you stay away from dairy and am curious as to why?

Before we get moving on some dairy education, I want to recognize that stealing someone’s cheese is about as serious to Americans as removing apple pie from the fall dessert lineup.  My goal with this series on going gluten-free and dairy-free is first and foremost to give you the information that I have learned. Second, it is to empower you to see where some of the health symptoms you or your family may be suffering with can have connections to nutrition.  And last, I want to empower you to evaluate those symptom connections, and equip you to evaluate for your own individual body whether or not gluten or dairy are offenders for you. With the rise of the ketogenic diet, we’ve seen a wave back into eating full-fat dairy products, so dairy gets a lot of debate and chatter these days - and for good reason.  Let’s take a look.  

What is dairy?

This is a bit more familiar category, but dairy encompasses milk and milk products like cream, butter, sour cream buttermilk, cheese, ghee, whey and whey-protein isolate, yogurt, ice cream and cheese curds.  Grass-fed dairy, such as Kerrygold butter, is a type of dairy that involves pastured cows fed grass, no grains.  There are varying degrees of grass-fed and regulation is a bit unclear, so getting to the source - your farmer - will answer the question of whether the animal only ate grass or also dined on grains.  Dairy does not include eggs or mayonnaise which can have an egg component, despite their location in the grocery store.  

Folks with dairy-issues may separate out goat and sheep’s milks and cheeses made with these milks because they contain a more easily digestible protein than cow’s milk.

Why is dairy a problem?  And for who?

When you’re a baby you need milk for nourishment, right?  In this season, your body also produces enzymes to digest lactase - one of the many proteins  in milk. As you grow out of infancy, the period of most rapid human growth, your body makes less and less lactase.  Some adults continue to be able to digest lactase and many others, as much of 75% of the world’s population is lactose intolerant.  Of these, around 40% can tolerate goat’s milk because of its different protein.  It is possible to have a milk allergy or an allergy to any of the protein components of dairy.

Let’s think about milk and milk production for a moment.  Milk is produced by who?  Lactating cows.  Who lactates?  A female mammal, after giving birth.  Who produces a host of hormones on a sliding scale in the months after birth?  Female mammals.  Typical dairy process is to pull the calf from the mother after birth, so that her milk may be used for human consumption.  While pasteurization will kill potentially pathogenic microbes, it does not remove hormones. What pasteurization does remove are the natural enzymes that aid the human body in digesting dairy’s proteins.  Some folks prefer raw milk, for the enzyme and more whole-food and high vitamin content, while others see the history of the purpose for pasteurization and walk away.  You are free to choose either way: raw or pasteurized.  

Know what you can’t choose about your milk?  The hormones passed from the mother, into your milk by way of her natural process of lactation that is meant to nourish her calf.  If you’re struggling with hormonal based issues, for example PCOS, a regular nutritional recommendation is to remove dairy from your diet for this extra hormones reason.  Additionally, to meet the demand for milk in a country where dairies are closing left and right - cows are being treated with synthetic growth hormones to increase production.  Unfortunately, these hormones also make their way into your milk. More hormones = no thanks.  Dairy consumption increases the body’s level of insulin-like growth factor-1 (IGF-1) - a known cancer promoter.  

Dairy is also a common food sensitivity, causing inflammation, which is again related to leaky gut.  When proteins make their way into the small intestine, undigested, they can then sneak out of the gut into the body where additional inflammation will occur.  Dairy has been shown to contribute to elevated CRP levels.  Additionally, eating grass-fed milk and milk products will keep the cow away from a grain-fed diet which changes their fatty acid profile.  Grass-fed cows products contain omega-3 and omega-6 fats at the ideal 1:1 ratio, while grain-fed animals produce more omega-6 fats, also known to be pro-inflammatory.  

But I just can’t quit my cheese, ice cream and afternoon frappuccino!

The final detail to considering dairy-free and the most compelling reason in our home is the addictive component.  Yep, those feels you’re having aren’t just in your head.

Remember some of the main proteins in milk: lactase, whey and casein?  In the body, casein becomes casomorphin and as their names indicate, casomorphin has morphinelike components.  In our brains, we have opiate receptors - that’s why opiates are so addicting and effective when used appropriately and why dopamine gives us the good feels - casomorphin attaches to these receptors and can produce the same feels as opiates.  

The levels are much lower than a drug, but can give you lessened versions of the same symptoms: spaciness and “brain fog”, continual fatigue, moodiness, anxiety and depression, sleep problems and problems with speech and hearing.  Too-high levels of casomorphin and the similar component found in gluten, gliadorphin, are common in children. A significant number of children and adults with ADHD are found to have high levels of either of these compounds and of those, 90% are high in casomorphin.  

In our home, casomorphin addiction was showing up at bedtime.  Once I was done nursing, we’d offer a bit of milk before bed and the antics would begin.  Oppositional behavior, punching, severe tantrums, generally over-the-top bedtime behavior that was at times scary.  I started to notice the pattern and replaced bedtime cow’s milk with almond milk. Wha-lah. Sweet, little bedtime boy. But it wasn’t that easy.  Once I removed the milk, the addiction kicked back in and I found cheese missing from the fridge each morning, then a pint of ice cream left empty in the freezer and corresponding handprints on the front.  My young preschooler was waking in the night and craving dairy and making his own way to consume it. I moved to remove all dairy from the home and we spent a bit of time with an irritable little guy who soon reverted to his mostly steady self, symptom free.  Sounds wild, but I’ve seen the same addictive effect in adults. Needing a daily milkshake or stopping by an ice cream store (or 3!) daily, only to have extreme periods of busyness or an extreme crash after milk consumption? You might give second thought to why that habit is in place - might be the milk and not your inability to control cravings.

Some of this is sounding familiar to me, but how would I know if I have a milk sensitivity?  

First things first, I’d ask if you experience any of the following on a regular basis: Acne, constipation, inflammation, bloating, gas, eczema, allergies, unexplained weight gain, post-nasal drip, irregular energy, asthma, chronic infections such as sinus or ear.  Related disease states include osteoporosis, obesity, diabetes, heart disease and ovarian, breast, colon and prostate cancers.

Second, you can easily take a food sensitivity test through an at-home option like Everlywell, or visit with a functional doctor who can order a Gluten/Casein peptide test from Great Plains Laboratory if you suspect you or your little may have an addictive response to dairy.  This can be a key component in healing up behavioral and mental health disorders, particularly in children who have less body mass with which to handle these opiate-receptor symptoms.

But wait, don’t I neeeeed milk so that I can get adequate calcium?

Yes, we need calcium, but most Americans are getting adequate levels through our foods, what we’re not getting are the cofactors that allow our body to use calcium.  Seeds, nuts, legumes and leafy greens are high in calcium as are sardines and salmon, if you’re worries about your intake.

You’re able to grow those strong bones apart from dairy, but what about keeping them? Turns out, calcium is not be as bone protective as we thought.  Studies have shown no benefit in preventing fractures, in fact Vitamin D is showing more protection against fractures.  Further, according to the Nurses’ Health Study dairy may increase risk of fractures by 50 percent. When it comes to osteoporosis, countries with the lowest rates of dairy and calcium consumption (like those in Asia and Africa) have the lowest rates.  Curious.

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What can I do if I suspect dairy may not be for me?  

Give it a rest for a season.  Again, it’s not forever, but we’re looking to have you break up with dairy for 4-6 weeks, then you can take note of your health and symptoms and compare them to the list you started the elimination with and compare.  If the change isn’t significant enough, then reintroduce dairy at one meal and take note of your body’s response. If you do see a shift in your health or a removal in any of the above symptom list, you may consider going dairy-free for life.  And the best news is the list of alternatives to cheese, yogurt, milks and ice creams is a mile long and growing all the time as producers respond to consumer demand. Now that’s something to “cheers” to!

Come back tomorrow for a practical lineup of ways you can introduce foods to your family and assimilate nutritional change no matter the ages or stages at your table.  This series will close out with a lengthy list of dairy-free and gluten-free snack ideas that easy to print and pop in your cabinet for a reminder at snack time, often the hardest time to stay on track!

Sources:

Ballayante, S. (2017). Paleo Principles. Canada: Tuttle Publishing.

Brighten, J. (2019). Beyond the Pill: A 30-day plan to eliminate period problems, boost libido, improve mood, clear ... skin, and ditch the pill when you’re ready. Place of publication not identified: Harper One.

Greenblatt, J., & Gottlieb, B. (2017). Finally focused: The breakthrough natural treatment plan for adhd that restores attention, minimizes hyperactivity, and helps eliminate drug side effects. New York: Harmony Books.

Hyman, M., MD. (2017, July 27). Are You Still Consuming Dairy? [Web log post]. Retrieved June 6, 2019, from https://drhyman.com/blog/2017/07/27/still-consuming-dairy/

Hyman, M., MD. (2010, June 24). Dairy: 6 Reasons You Should Avoid It at all Costs [Web log post]. Retrieved June 5, 2019, from https://drhyman.com/blog/2010/06/24/dairy-6-reasons-you-should-avoid-it-at-all-costs-

Mynar, S. (Host). (2019, Mar 19). Should You Go Dairy-Free Keto? Everything You Need To Know To Decide For Yourself -- #092 [Audio Podcast]. Retrieved from https://http://ketoforwomen.libsyn.com


Eating Gluten and Dairy Free with Kids: How and why would I?
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Hey, hey, Mae: How exactly DO you eat and why?
How did you go gluten-free and dairy-free with kids?

Grandma’s brownies, chips, family-recipe chocolate chip cookies and pouches of fruit punch Capri-Sun were the high, yummy points of my childhood.  Add in a side of Derby pie and a homemade southern biscuit and I was living a pretty solid life. Which...made my recent health crisis and the subsequent changes in health our family needed to make for - mental health, ASD, ADHD and a host of anxiety and depression sides to thyroid, gut and skin health - more than a bummer.  Working through our healing was an easy path into nutrition for me as I had severe nutrient depletions and my boys’ issues presented long term outlooks in either medication or nutrition. There was little choice if I wanted to heal up, get to walking around and continue living a full life.

Maybe you don’t have any pressing health issues - just a quiet desire to feed your children well. But what does that mean?  To NOURISH our children? First, we must take a look at how we got here.  

If you’re like me, you may have been raised on some or all components of the Standard American Diet (SAD).  I was blessed with a farm family who ate salad with every meal and always a veggie or three, but I was not immune from the food triangle of our youth.  

Did you know that our American food system has been designed around the center in our brain that derives pleasure from certain flavors - sugar, salt and fat - called the hedonistic center.  When I watched my boys’ eating, I saw quickly how this region of their brain propelled them to foods that lit up this pleasure seeking center. It is here in the brain that dopamine production is stimulated, which fuels our deep sense of wanting - not satiation or liking, but a desire for more.  More sugar. More salt. More fat.  Anyone identify when thinking of a hangry 2-year-old or even a hangry me?  

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There are biochemical reasons behind our cravings.

Historically, the introduction of refined sugar took our consumption from a few pounds of sugar per person, per year to 160 pounds per person annually in the United States.  Wait, what?  My toddler is eating 160 pounds of sugar annually?  Maybe.  But maybe it’s you or I having a bit more than that average - many people upwards of 200 pounds of sugar annually - that balances out that measure for our children.  And it’s not in our grapes and apples, folks.

Processed food, I’m looking at you.  

As our world industrialized, we looked for quicker meals.  We needed to eat in a jiffy so we could get back to working or resting from working.  Sugar, white flour and processed oil began to make up much of our food as Americans simultaneously transitioned from physical labor to sedentary labor.  It was cheap, lots could be made from it and it lit up those pleasure centers. More machinery now meant we could take those machines and get really good at mass producing all sorts of foods.  Producing foods?  Didn’t we used to grow and enjoy food that grew?  Of course we did.  

The rise of big food and corporate food producers meant a shift toward hyperpalatable foods that focused on that hedonistic center of the brain.  Add in a side of branding with a sprinkle of sugar and so many of us and our children were hooked on processed food, much thanks to shiny marketing.  Brands even have vast influence over public policy and research. Who cares?  Remember that food pyramid? Big food played a key hand in swaying the design of a heavily weighted main food group focused on processed grains.  Big food designs processed foods for our desires - adding in chemical components to foods (MSG anyone?) that can increase our hunger levels and even turn off our hormonal cues for satiety.  No wonder our babies want “one more...cookie, cracker, biscuit, popsicle….”. They’re simply responding with their biology to the way food is designed.

Eating these nutrient-poor, calorie-rich processed foods leaves us with increasing appetite as we continue to crave sufficient nutrients.  Packaged foods are also so much prettier than whole foods which often have dirt attached and the occasional bug or two - not to mention how much longer it may take to prepare these foods once they’re clean.  Cravings also begin in our gut microbiome, where the microbial populations present can generate desires for foods that their hosts - us - don’t necessarily desire. Toss in the rapid rise in food reactions adults and children alike experience and we’re often raising picky eaters who can have some forms of disordered eating.  Much easier to toss over a pack of crackers to quiet the squeaky wheel...ahem...whiny child...then fight the battle over peas and carrots.  I feel ya.  

I used to really like my crackers, cookies and cereal, too.  That is until I linked behavior issues in our home, my neurological decline, arthritis, deep nutritional deficiencies, mental health struggles and triggering ADHD/ASD behaviors - directly to various foods we were consuming.  Simple food journals showed me that the foods we were consuming linked directly to many of the struggles we were having.  

So what did we do about it?

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For our host of issues, some of us spent a long season on the Autoimmune Paleo Protocol, eliminating immunosuppressant groups of foods (grains, legumes, soy, dairy, processed food, refined sugars, seed oils, eggs, nightshades, nuts, seeds) supporting healing and then reintroducing offenders to see what the response looked like.  Others cut gluten and dairy, strictly and still some can handle bits of both of these groups, in more whole forms. That’s the detailed version. We each moved toward eating in a bio-individual way, because we’re individuals.  Over time, through nutritional therapy - a form of holistic nutrition - healing has occurred and we’re mostly free from steep parameters.  

On the whole, we moved toward eating more whole, nutrient-dense foods and have stuck with no-gluten and no-dairy.  

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The biggest question I get asked is “How in the world did you do that with children?” and my best answer is “it’s our new normal”.  My second is, “the boys don’t run the household food show.” Sounds harsh? Sure. But I want them to have as much access to their whole mind and body for as long as they can, to develop habits that will serve them and to one day send them into the world with the know-how to care for themselves in the best way, even if it bucks the system.  And I’m the Mom.  So I lead up the food attitudes since I’m preparing it all!

This article begins a series that will highlight two of the groups that we cut out and the various reasons for doing so.

One, so that you may identify understanding for others who have these food needs.  Two, so that you can learn more about the ways in which gluten and dairy work for or against our bodies.  I’ll end with a blitz over my methodology for switching the boys from processed foods to more whole foods and no gluten/dairy.  

To wrap the whole thing up, I’ll make available a massive list of gluten and dairy-free snacks that you can run to when you’re looking for a whole-foods option.  It’ll feature an easy purchased snack list, too - because let’s be honest - we are all working with limited time at some point or another.

My biggest goal is to free you up to explore eating FOR your health and preparing food to NOURISH our children so they can grow up to do what they were made to do!  I would love to hear your food struggles, concerns and questions!

Sources:

Goodman, A. (2013, March 1). The Weaponizing of Salt, Sugar and Fat: The Secrets of How Big Food Got Us Hooked on Junk. Retrieved from Alternet: https://www.alternet.org/food/weaponizing-salt-sugar-and-fat-secrets-how-bigfood-got-us-hooked-junk

Kresser, C. (2018, May 30). The Power of an Ancestral Perspective on Diet. Retrieved from Nutritional Therapy Association: https://nutritionaltherapy.com/the-power-of-an-ancestral-perspecive-on-diet/

Nutritional Therapy Association, Inc. (2019, June 2). Basics of Nutrition.  

Nutritional Therapy Association, Inc. (2019, June 2). The Evolution of the Modern Diet.  

Wolf, R. (2017). Wired To Eat. In R. Wolf, Wired To Eat. Harmony.





Affirmations for Children: Raising Kid's EQ
Affirmations for Children: Raising Kids' EQ | Mindfulness can feel like a big mountain to climb, then you throw kids in the mix and it seems like a lofty goal: a far-and-away idea that is less than possible.

Mindfulness can feel like a big mountain to climb, then you throw kids in the mix and it seems like a lofty goal: a far-and-away idea that is less than possible. However, the research doesn’t lie - mindfulness and meditation combat stress, poor moods and anxiety. On the flip side, it fosters compassion for others, self-compassion, improved focus and moods - even combats depression. It can often impact relationships, chronic disease, weight loss, physical pain and improve our sleep! Meditation has even been found to shift the outcome of breast cancer. Hope!

Any kiddos out there struggling to sleep?

Rewiring our brains is possible and happens through activities like mindfulness, meditation and affirmations. It’s these exercises for the mind that build up and nourish positive pathways for traits like focus and decision making to improve - even sleep! While we add in the good and fortify the positive, less positive pathways diminish - resulting in less fear and stress.

Sounds great for Mommy, but kiddos, too?

While we don’t typically think of children as experiencing stress or battling depression and anxiety, they do! As they develop, many ordinary things happen that they don’t yet have the tools to understand or respond to. Then there are the bigger road bumps like bullying, mental health issues (ADHD, ADD, ASD etc.), divorce, death, loss, stress in the home or even interacting with their peers who experience these complications in life - then these peers act out because of the experiences they can’t understand in their lives and our kids struggle secondarily.

Our sweet family has weathered the above list and then some. What started as a breath-work practice for me targeted at retraining my body that experienced abuse - turned into meditation, free-writing and lots of affirmations to combat my past reality triggering my present physical body. When I saw the shift in my racing heart and reeling mind that was often triggered by the simple presence of a male, I was intrigued to help my boys.

We began with simple, general affirmations, developed some specifically to their trials and picked up some from a favorite teacher. Cal recently recited a few of his favorite lines when he faced a struggle and Tru reminded himself that “I did hard things! I can do what I put my mind to!” on the ride home after a tricky swim lesson.

So how do we integrate affirmations and mindfulness into life with a 2 and 5-year-old?

 

Diligence counts here - so do car rides. When I find there’s a lull in the play or the car has grown quiet, I’ll simple tell the boys we’re gonna take a couple breaths together. If they’re up I’ll bring them in by making it a game - who can breathe in the loudest? who can exhale the longest? When they’re down I’ll match their mood and quietly suggest we take some strong breaths together and remember things we’re great at! They’ll usually wind down after 3 breaths or get excited to particiapte and I’ll simply make a statement and ask them to repeat it.

ME: “I have good things to say!” Say it back to Momma?

BOYS: “I have good things to say.”

ME: “YES you do! I love the things you have to say; I have good things to say!”

BOYS: “I have good things to say.”

Sometimes I’ll move right into another affirmation, or Tru will ask a question about something he recently said that provoked response in another. Often I’ll move to a building affirmation - something that the child specifically needs to hear or will combat a harmful situation they’re enduring.

ME: “No one is more important than me, and I am no more important than anyone else. Can you say that long one?”

BOYS: “No one is more important than me, and I am no more important than anyone else.”

ME: “OH WOW, you can even remember long ones! That’s right - no one is more important, and we all listen to others speak. Can you pick your favorite learning to tell to me?”

BOYS: “I have good things to say and I listen to people?”

ME: “Ah, that’s so good and true boys. I know you treat others with respect, no matter who they are.”

At this point, they’ll either repeat some version of what I’ve said or wander off in to their own play or minds. Both are fine with me. If they’re still focused, we’ll continue with a couple more or I’ll end it by thanking them for talking about important things with me.

 

Little by little, these mini-meditations have increased the boys’ conversational focus, have brought out scary issues they’d not brought up on their own and has increased their confidence in the face of fear. Sometimes one boy won’t participate or will treat them as silly. Sometimes they’re simple and combat discipline issues - “I don’t bite anyone. I bite my food.” They also work wonders at bedtime, particularly if I’m planting them in the day. “I am full from my good day and now I’ll let my body rest!”


Daily, I’m still planting them - like we do scripture songs and immediate lessons - into their little hearts and minds, because those things surface when life is scary, something is hard or there is a challenge with a friend and no adult around to help make sense of it. Equipping our kids to handle the stressors, traumas and suffering we all experience can be such a gift to them - and a gift to the world if we focus some of our affirmations around the treatment and respect of others.

 

Here’s a growing list of my favorite affirmations for kids (and Mommas!) -would love to hear yours and your experiences in the comments!

Affirmations for Children: Equipping Kids' EQ | Equipping our kids to handle the stressors, traumas and suffering we all experience can be such a gift to them - and a gift to the world if we focus some of our affirmations around the treatment and respect of others.

I am smart.

I am accepted.

I am loved.  Jesus loves me.  He delights in me. 

My mom delights in me. My mom loves me.

No matter what's going on in my life, I love myself...UNCONDITIONALLY. 

No one is more important than me, and I am no more important than anyone else.

I am funny.  

I am brave.  God gives me courage!

I have good things to say.  

I am a friendly guy.

I am not intimidated because I am bold and full of courage. 

I make wise decisions that bring health and life.

I make wise choices.

Affirmations for Children: Raising Kid's EQ | So how do we integrate affirmations and mindfulness into life with a 2 and 5-year-old?

I am great at my number one job to listen and obey - I listen and obey my mom. Then I can learn to listen and obey God.

I have a strong mind that is alert and receptive.

I do ALL things with excellence. 

I give my best.

I accomplish whatever I put my mind to if I put in the effort.

I prosper in all things.

I take set backs as temporary and bounce back quickly.

I control my attitudes and my emotions because I control my thoughts. 

I can change my mind with truth.  ( I renew my thoughts to the truth of Gods word, so I can renew my feelings, emotions and attitudes)

I choose my attitude.

I can manage what I’ve been given, because all things work together for my good.

I expect to do well because I am prepared, I am able and I will do my best. 

I can learn.

I can try new things.

I show love to everyone I meet.  

God has not given me a spirit of fear.  God has given me a spirit of power!  God has given me a spirit of love! God has given me a sound mind and a spirit to use it with!

I do not fear be because I am accepted

I do not fear because I am loved

Perfect love casts out fear

I am found in Perfect Love because God is love and God lives in me. Love lives in me.

God has not given me a spirit of fear but of Power, Love and a Sound Mind.

Affirmations for Children: Raising Kid's EQ While we don’t typically think of children as experiencing stress or battling depression and anxiety, they do!  As they develop, many ordinary things happen that they don’t yet have the tools to understand or respond to.

REFERENCES

Headspace. (2019) https://www.headspace.com/science/meditation-benefits

Mayer, B., Polak MG, Remmerswaal D. (2019) Mindfullness, Interpretation Bias, and Levels of Anxiety and Depression: Two Meditation Studies. doi:10.1007/s12671-018-0946-8

Rosen, K. D., Paniagua, S. M., Kazanis, W., Jones, S., & Potter, J. S. (2018). Quality of Life Among Women Diagnosed with Breast Cancer: A Randomized Waitlist Controlled Trial of Commercially Available Mobile App-Delivered Mindfulness Training. Psycho-Oncology. doi:10.1002/pon.4764

Sunday Afternoon Chocolate Chip Chewies Paleo

These Sweet Sunday Afternoon Chocolate Chip Chewies are both gluten free and dairy free. They’d even fit the paleo cookie lineup, too!

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This one-bowl paleo cookie recipe makes 8 chewy cookies and comes together quickly. Almond flour, butter, maple syrup and a farm fresh egg can pack some nutrients in to a sunny, Sunday treat spot. I simply assign each ingredient to the kiddos and have them pour into one bowl. A few turns with a wooden spoon and you’re ready to roll. The batter consistency is more like play-doh than a typical cookie batter. They’re a quick cook and a quick mix and a good means of self control, because they only make 8.

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Sunday Afternoon Chocolate Chip Chewies Paleo

One-Bowl Paleo, Gluten-free, Dairy-free Chocolate Chip Chewy Cookie

Makes: 8 Cookes

Prep time:

Cook time:

Ingredients:
  • 1 Egg
  • ½ c. Almond Butter
  • 2 T Coconut sugar or sweetener of choices
  • 3-4 T Blanched Almond Flour
  • 1 T maple Syrup
  • ½ t Baking Soda
  • Pinch Salt
  • ¼ c Chocolate Chips (Enjoy Life are dairy/gluten free)

Instructions:
  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line baking sheet with parchment paper.
  2. Put all ingredients in one bowl, except chocolate chips.
  3. Mix.
  4. Fold in chocolate chips.
  5. Drop 8 equal sized spoonfuls onto the baking sheet..
  6. Bake 10-12 minutes.
It's All About the Elderberry Lego Gummies

While you don’t have to shape these immune-boosting gummies into various sized Lego-men and bricks, I do quite enjoy these lego gummy molds, and my little men go bananas for them! I grabbed these molds off of amazon and use a turkey baster to fill them up. Use a baster for gummy making - it’ll change your life! So much easier.

I made these as a riff on Danielle Walker’s recent cookbook recipe. Hers calls for using elderberries to simmer and then make the gummies, but I don’t have berries and I did have elderberry syrup a friend made for us. It’s also an easy buy at the store, these days, or a quick Amazon grab. I prefer to choose a syrup made with Honey, but you do you! I also wanted to add a little more tang, lower pH and vitamin C so I added a bit more lemon juice. These elderberry gummies come together well and I think you’ll like them lots, jello mold or not!

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Elderberry Syrup Gummies

Description of Recipe

Makes: 2 cups Gummies

Name of image (title of post is fine)

Prep time:

Cook time:

Ingredients:
  • 1/4 c. Elderberry Syrup
  • 1/2 c. Apple Juice
  • 1/2 c. Pomegranate Juice
  • 2 T Lemon Juicee
  • 2 T honey
  • 1/4 c. Gelatin

Instructions:
  1. Combine all ingredients in a pan over medium heat, except gelatin. Bring just to before simmer.
  2. Whisk in gelatin. Pour slowly to avoid clumping and whisk until combined.
  3. Reduce heat and leave at just below a simmer 8-10 minutes, whisking occasionally.
  4. Remove from heat and promptly divide among silicone trays using a turkey baster. Place in fridge to set.

I hope (and know!) your littles will love these as much as mine. I often serve 1-2 gummies as dessert to lunch on our school days or for a snack here and there. I’ve also subbed the pomegranate for other juices that I had on hand and they’ve worked great. I love to choose raw, local honey when possible, too - but often squeeze in my costco honey. For a fun little sour boost, I’ll roll them in Natural Calm Magnesium powder right before serving or dip their feet in the powder and call them snow day lego guys. Possibilities are endless! Enjoy!

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Easy Ingredient Sourcing

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Your kind support of this space is much appreciated, but certainly not necessary. That said, I only list my tried and true favorites!